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My supervisor at the college bookstore. My name is Edelio, after my Cuban father and grandfather. Made me feel angry & disrespected (via microaggressions)
This is just one of the many facets of assimilation that I hate. The fact that people of color (esp. immigrants) are sometimes forced to take on “wholesome, pronounceable Christian names” to appease the vocabulary of the uncultured makes me fucking angry. Both my mom and my dad had to take on new names once they came here, because they were afraid of being singled out as immigrants. They wanted something that looked good on applications so they’d have a better chance at getting jobs.
When I was elementary school, teachers and kids alike would stumble over my surname and, in defeat, create silly nicknames or continue to mispronounce my name because they didn’t have the effort to give me the basic respect that comes with proper pronunciation. When teachers would call roll, they’d just say my first name, and that was that. Some didn’t even bother to learn how to spell it right (as some report cards and award certificates will show.)
Names are more important than most people realize, and mine has had some negative influence over the years. I don’t hate my name by any means, but I don’t like how I have to have a “normal” one to gain any kind of respect or that I have to worry about whether or not I’ll get a fucking job cause my asshat of a boss can’t even take two seconds to ask how zie should pronounce it.
(via aintitgrand)
this is SO my life. I know Tati-Ana may look daunting…I’m lying it’s fucking simple, who doesnt understand TAH TEE AH NUH!? I just don’t get it. I’ve been called Tanta-tay, Tabitha, Teeantuh, Tiantah, ect. If you don’t know how to say it or you’re scared you’ll fuck it up: JUST ASK.
(via marfmellow)
One of the reasons I didn’t keep Karnythia as a first name is because of the ways in which people fuck up pronouncing it. Someone said it was chrysanthemum once. Look at my name, look at chrysanthemum…yeah.
(via karnythia)
To my knowledge I’ve never missed or nearly-missed tangible professional opportunities due to my name, but that doesn’t mean it hasn’t happened or won’t happen. There have been definite tangible effects on my personal life, though. The name I go by and have gone by my whole life is actually my legal middle name. My legal first name is super Anglo-Christian-American and my parents gave it to me because, you know, SECOND GENERATION IN THE HIZZOUSE LET’S GET OUR ASSIMILATION ON FOR HER PROFESSIONAL FUTURE, but they only ever called me by my Korean name. My Anglo name feels uncomfortable, and I’m actually thinking of legally changing my name so I don’t have to deal with that awkward “I’m on the roster as ‘Mary’* but I go by ‘Haemin”* just so you know” song and dance at the beginning of every semester with a new teacher.
When I tell people that I have an “American” name invariably someone will burst out with, “Well why don’t you just go by that? It’s so much easier/less hassle/blargh.” To which I’m like, “Well why don’t you just go by ‘Assface’? That’s pretty easy to pronounce, too.”
Actually, true story: very early on in our relationship, C. was one of those people. It took a few pretty heated conversations to explain to him why I value my name and why it’s valid for me to hold on to it, AND why it’s valid to feel irritated with people who are like, “IT’S SO HARD TO PRONOUNCE” and “CAN’T YOU JUST GO BY A NICKNAME” and “WHY WON’T YOU CONTORT YOUR FUCKING NAME FOR THE SAKE OF MY WHITEBREAD COMFORT”. Once it clicked, though, C. never pulled that shit again. EVER. Not with me, not with anyone else.
*Not my real names, obvs.
(via hidden-midden)
but it’s so hard, just EVER SO HARD for white people to do that for you guise with your funny curry-smelling names! /sobbing sarcasm
(via torayot)
It was frustrating enough with my long-form name being on official things, when I go by a short version. I’ve had people refuse to let me pay bills, etc, because I’ve said my name is ‘Kate’ when they’ve got ‘Katherine’ on the file. But that’s just a frustrating incident, not an identity issue.
This morning I heard a song which I cannot find on the internet (I think it might have been on the end of a Friends of Marilyn podcast?). The lyrics went ‘I’m in love with a girl/I can’t pronounce her name/but that’s ok/I love her anyway’.
It made me want to SMASH THINGS. YOU’LL love her, even though she has an identity and language that is inconvenient for you? HOW NICE. Seriously. If you love her, put some fucking effort in and learn how to say her goddamn name.
(via nolackofloquaciousness)
